As a kid I played the Jet Car Stunts demo on the and as a child with NO allowance. I could not afford such an expensive game so I was stuck playing the same few levels of the demo, until one day very far in the future I checked to see if the game was ever ported onto Steam and it was.

So I bought it on sale for around 50 cents. Which is a really fair price. So Jet Car Stunts is a platformer which is kind of a weird direction for a game about a car with a jet engine. You'd think it be about racing as fast as you possibly can but its not.

Basically you drive and platform around very basic geometry with areas consisting of blocks and platforms. I like how the game looks because the levels feel like a mix of dreamcore and frutiger aero. It also probably helps that the game was developed in 2009 a few years before frutiger aero fell out of popularity.

There isn't really a setting the game takes place in, the most you'll get is "your in the sky lul" which is fine for a remaster of a mobile game from 2009. and heh if you were around those times phones weren't very powerful then, which explains the visual style of the game. (It's kind of weird how mobile games have gotten less interesting as phones have gotten more powerful though [not really its been happening to literally fucking everything over the last 10+ years cough movies, cough triple a video games[Indie games are better than ever though], cough the internet, cough fast food, cough etc. but hey at least theres still diamonds in the dust amiright lul {ultrakill}]).

I really like how the levels look with all the bright natural colors on the blocks and all the levels having a nice warm yellow or a cool blue lighting to it, the skyboxes are very nice too. they feel really cozy to play on. It looks like it be really relaxing to hop out of the car and just watch the earth below you. Honestly seeing the air balloons in the game make me want to try riding one just to see how it feels.

The platforming levels start out with some simple jumps and some short flights the platforming gets more precise and technical as you get through each level. The game encourages you to beat your records by putting a ghost of your previous runs on the level you just beat sometimes other player's ghost appear on the course too and they will usually be another player that is at a similar completion speed to you so you don't just get some speed runner that can beat the level in like 4 secondsm, you also recieve a ranking depending on how fast you beat the level and a couple of achievements for getting through a group of levels at a certain speed.

The later levels get a lot harder as you go on like most games, the levels challenge make you focus on the timing of each boost you use and your control of the car. They'll use thin platforms and short platforms to test your reaction time and precision with each jump. They also make the jumps a lot farther I got in the trap of doing the exact paths the developers placed on the track, Which is a lot harder to do because of the accuracy you need to make it through the hoops they placed to guide you and it made me really frusterated I also sped through certain parts of the game making me constantly fail certain sections when I played through this game a few years ago so a lot of the earlier frusterations I had wrote in an earlier version of this were just untrue the game is pretty fun all the way through if you aren't trying to boost through everything like an asshole. I also had other player's ghost on, which probably didn't help with my competitiveness.

Most of the bad parts of the game I remembered is from 2 specific parts which are in very hard C and all of very hard E which have areas in them that ask you for near perfect accuracy in very small holes then also immediately ask you to pull of another action with very hard C you need to slow down right when you make it through the hole which is very difficult because if you use the airbrakes too early you'll crash into a wall or fall off the world if you use them too late you hit a wall and DIE and just all of very hard E sucks but I did do a cool skip in it. Maybe one day I'll finally get my bronze medal in very hard E.

I actually made a video on it where I’m crashing out because of the final level (which is very hard E its not very fun).

A couple things that really bug me about the game are the camera controls and the limited retries. The camera controls basically don't exist the camera always faces one direction except when you reverse, the camera faces back at a slight angle like as if you were reversing out of a parking spot and looking back so you don't crush a child. The camera is attached to the car so when the car starts spinning the camera also spins with it. It's very chaotic and fast and it hurts my poor brain. they could add a camera system that isn't parented to the car and have it default to an upwards position to prevent that sort of thing from happening. Also adding actual controls to the camera would be nice so its easier to see where your going if you make a jump at an angle. Limited retries is annoying for obvious reasons. It's not fun losing progress during hard sections and having to do everything before it all over.

I have a newish addition to this, as I was replaying the game to get footage for the clips that I used in this page. I tried to skip a large chunk of some levels but if you don't hit every checkpoint in a level you don't get to win, which is total bullshit. This isn't a racing game where you need to play fair with other players this is a PLATFORMING game and some of the best PLATFORMERS lets you skip sections of levels with the movesets they give you (one my personal favorites being Pseudoregalia [gawd that game is so fucking good AND ITS NOT JUST CUZ OF THAT HOT GOAT WOMAN {the platforming is just really fucking good UGH its so fucking good man, please buy and play it}]) such as Pseudoregalia, Mario Galaxy, A Hat in Time and Marble It Up (this one is good too [thank you for bringing this game up Patricia]) but you sadly can't play with the moveset much outside of your designated playing area and you have to play it THEIR way or you don't win I guess the overly percise section in certain levels kind of suck and should DIE. But other than those couple of flaws its a fun game the Car feels good to control it's a bit stiff after you get into the air but everything else about it is fun. It feels great to drift and to hit jumps during a boost, yup its prettyyyyyyyyy good.

There are a couple extra gamemodes, there is time trial (peak) and collector (not peak).

So lets start with time trial, this gamemode is my favorite out of the 3 modes. There are unique maps and a unique car just for this mode it has slightly adjusted boost and air control to make the car feel amazing for going as fast as you can and the levels are all super fun to play on, the tracks are nice and wide so the jumps are usually low risk so you can focus on going as fast as you can. You can take corners nice and tight using a mix of the air brake and jet boosters to keep you from falling off the platforms and keeping your speed up. I do wish this mode had a few more maps but you can always just beat your record I guess. But yeah this is the mode you should get this game for, its genuinely a great time (I wish I had more to say about this mode but its pretty simple and I am much better at bitching then I am at praising).

The other mode though… its not so good. I don't think this mode came with the original game and you can really tell with how slapped together this mode feels. You also get a modified car in the collector gamemode. It gives you way better air control than the other 2 cars allowing you to fly relatively freely which is pretty cool and also drifting got massively buffed you can turn 90 degrees in under a second lul. It makes me wish we got some of the platforming levels with that car because it would allow the map designers to have more free and open map design and just let you fuck around in the sky.

The maps used in this mode are reused from the platforming levels with the collectables just throw about in the most random fucking spots. The spots they chose to place the collectibles at feel kind of random and are often really hard to get to. The major problem with the mode is that it's not challenging in a way that test your skills that have been taught or built upon by the game but instead you have to pull off bullshit tricks that have never been required anywhere else in the game. The tricks you have to do to get to the stars is something no normal player would attempt to do (im not a normal player so i beat the mode ez win) and if it was me when I was a wee lad I would probably HATE this mode because my dumbass wouldn't be able to figure out the tech necessary to collect most these fucking stars or maybe I wouldn't have given a fuck about the stars and just fly around the maps without a care in the world.

This mode isnt very fun or all that good, I would even say its FUCKING SHIT other than the modified car which is a highlight in this mode for the crazy shit you can pull off with it. Honestly if the alternate cars were a reward you could get after beating the game to play on the normal levels I think that would be pretty epic.

But ya you should play the game. It's only 3 dollars on steam and if you are patient you could get it on sale for even less and its a relatively short game. It only took me about 3 hours to MOSTLY beat the game also that like enough money to buy 2 mcdonalds sodas and it probably takes up one one millionth of a COD game file size. So uh yeah you dont have a good excuse to not get it. I will say this again the game is absolutely worth the price they are asking for, also make sure to have a controller cuz this game sucks to play without one.

I wish the sequel got ported to steam but for whatever reason they didnt. But you were able to it on Xbox Live Arcade you can at least get it on mobile still. Plz port the second game to steam (they arent gonna see this :((( ). Also a third game could be awesome maybe they try doing more open ended levels like in mario 64 that could be a good way to implement the collectables in a fun way or maybe the second game already did that I wouldn't know cuz I haven't played it and its not ported to steam so its not super easy for me to access. Ok, I don’t think I have any more dumb bullshit to add now. buh bye.